Technical Difficulties

We're STILL waiting for our internet connection to be set up. It was supposed to be yesterday, but that didn't happen.

I do have a few things to post about*, but they would be too long to do from my phone (and one involves photos). Much as I love my little touchscreen phone, typing much more than a Twitter update can drive me nut

So I'll get back to posting once we're all sorted. Sorry for the delay!

*Like discovering and using some public use outdoor fitness equipment, moderation versus deprivation, and my beef with bariatric surgery (there was talk of the surgery in the radio last week). Plus new weigh in results on Wednesday.

"Lifestyle" appointment

Today I headed down to the medical centre for a lifestyle appointment. Which is an appropriate name, I suppose. I got a few pamphlets, had a good chat, got my blood pressure taken, and weighed in.

My blood pressure has been high for a while. I don't think I had a problem with it before, but to be honest I hadn't really given it that much thought. My mother had been severely overweight at one point (over 400 pounds), and doctors were always baffled that her blood pressure wasn't that high. Now I think of it, they may have meant in relation to her weight.

Bottom line is that it's something else I need to keep an eye on. My love affair with salt must become a platonic friendship.

Good news though: I lost a kilogram! That's 2.2 pounds! I didn't eat as well as I could have, so I'm quite pleased with that. I updated the sidebar (save for the bmi, as I'm having to update via my phone and can't have two windows open at once... no net connection yet at the new house).

I'm headed back in two weeks to check my blood pressure again and for another weigh in (and I can keep coming in to stand on the scale for as long as I want, even after my blood pressure gets better). This is one if those times when NHS is really awesome.

That's all for now! Hopefully we'll get the internet connection sorted next week.

Lock down

I have officially enjoyed my last bit of chocolate for four weeks (until my birthday on the 16th). It was the last four squares of a lovely 30p Somerfield dark chocolate bar. I still think it's a bit nuts how cheap that stuff is for how good it tastes.

This is going to be a bit mentally challenging, as chocolate is one of those things that makes my brain go, "I WANT, I NEED," especially during PMS and crazy period times. There have been times when I didn't have any and would literally pace around the kitchen looking for something to fill that gap. Then I'd eat a load of other stuff and would still find myself unsatisfied and craving chocolate even more. If I can train myself that it's just a treat and not a necessity, I think I'll be in a good place. I know it will probably take longer than four weeks to accomplish that, but I think it's a good start.

Michael (my husband) is taking the rest of what we had in the house to work with him, and we won't bring any into the house in that four week period. (We should be mostly moved in tomorrow, fingers crossed!) We'll also be stocking a lot of fruit.

Feeling a bit of withdrawal already, but it's for the best.



WHAT HAVE I DONE?

Begin again at the beginning

Last week, a doctor told me she couldn't renew my prescription for birth control because I was too fat. She was also unable to take my blood pressure because the machine couldn't read me (though I'd had no problem before when I was heavier, but I was in the States then). She had me step on the scale, and looked a bit horrified and disgusted. Or maybe I just thought she did, because I was embarrassed and ashamed after what she'd already said.

The scale was metric, and she couldn't tell me what my weight was in pounds, but she did convert it to stone. I didn't actually find out until I plugged the numbers into a unit converter after I got home. She wanted me to schedule a "lifestyle" appointment (I'm assuming it's something to do with talking to a nurse about nutrition and exercise). I left the medical centre trying not to cry. I hadn't realized the problem had gotten that bad again.

I am now about 10 pounds below the only weight I can remember being recorded when I was at my heaviest six years ago. Since then I'd lost and gained and lost again, never breaking the 200 barrier. All of those times I was doing it on my own, and didn't have a system in place to keep me accountable. So I'd keep failing and reverting back to eating things I knew were bad for me, and eating when I was sad or bored or happy or just because I wanted the taste of something in my mouth (in many previous entries of her blog, Dietgirl mentions textures as well, and that's part of it too). I told my husband the other day that I seem to have an oral fixation in the way a smoker does. After the general HUR HUR ORAL was out of the way, he agreed. I graze a bit. I'm always eating something or drinking something unless I can distract myself.

We've already started eating more healthy food. More fruit and veg. I've switched to skimmed milk for my coffee (still semi-skimmed for drinking by itself and cereal). I was originally allowing myself a tiny amount of chocolate a day, but that has proven dangerous. So, as we're in the middle of moving house, I've decided that there will be no chocolate going into the new place. I'm giving it up until my birthday (February 16th). Which will be hard, but it needs to be done to help curb the addiction so that one day I'll be able to enjoy some quality chocolate and not want to eat a truck load.

My husband is being very supportive, and is in fact doing this along with me as he has a little bit of weight he'd like to shed. I think with his support (as well as writing everything down) I'll be able to make a real go at this and succeed.

As you can see, I've put my stats in the sidebar. Just starting numbers. I don't have a scale yet, so it might be a while until I update that (but I might see if the nurse will weigh me when I go in on Wednesday).

Here goes nothing!